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Guest Post: A Date With A Jedi

February 24, 2011

This time around, I’m handing over the reigns to one of my oldest and dearest friends.  Karen and I went to High School/College together and used to be roomies.  Needless to say, we have been sharing dating stories since we were 16.  We have tons of stories we could share about dating AND online dating but THIS story…this story is good.  Here, I’ll let her tell it and you can comment below.

“It’s odd enough when your life comes to a point when online dating sites are your best course to meeting a potential companion. I mean, when you’re perpetually busy and tired of meeting guys in bars (because that’s generally so successful…”you’re an alcoholic?, me too! what are the chances?!”), where else do you go?  Unfortunately it gets even weirder in some cases…like this one.

I start talking to this seemingly sweet, intelligent, reasonably “normal” guy on eHarmony. He’s a freelance graphic designer in my area…and pretty cute. So, I agree to meet for coffee in my neighborhood. (Ahem, I should mention I didn’t pick up red flag no. 1 when he said he’d stopped drinking…sorry, but if you can’t enjoy a cocktail here and there I probably don’t have business with you anyway!…just being honest.)  Anyway, I digress.  So I meet said guy at Cosi and our initial conversation is going swimmingly.  He’s got a wicked sense of humor and the conversation is effortless, zero uncomfortable silences.  So I ask him what the pictures on his Facebook with the kids were from (yes, we idiotically friended each other). They were all in costume and playing with swords. I thought it was cute and maybe a youth group he volunteered or worked with or something. Oh boy…was I wrong.

He drops the bomb I thought we’d skipped over…”Oh, I’m a Jedi.”  looooooooooooong pause.

me: “I’m sorry…what?”

him: “That’s what I do. I’m a Jedi.”

me: “HAHA! I’m sorry…what?”

him: “I’m a PA Jedi. We’re in 15 states right now and growing.”

me: “I think I need you to explain.”

him: “We train and get hired to perform places like baseball games. We also do impromptu performances and film them in random places.”

me: “I thought you did graphic design.”

him: “Yeah…I used to. But this is what I love. I do it all of the time.”

me: “Do you get paid for all of it?”

him: “No, most of it is volunteer.”

me: “Ok.”

Then I kind of dropped it….because I honestly didn’t know how to react to this information without being rude. So I decided it was time to go, obviously!

Here’s the kicker, he was parked right next to me. Now he’s excited because he’s taken my lack of reaction as acceptance apparently. First he asked if he could kiss me..I said that wouldn’t be a good idea. Then he insists I play with one of the 3 light sabers he keeps in his car!!! If only that meant

something different.  But no, he had light sabers in his car and wanted me to swing one around. Come one…I’m in my ‘hood and people I know are in the coffee shop…couldn’t be more awkward…  So I give a weak little obligatory swing and the damn thing makes noises and lights up! Ugh.

So his profile mentioned nothing of the Jedi fascination; the pictures are all pretty expected; and all of our prior conversation pointed toward him being average (sans the no drinking). Shame on me for not taking a closer look at the very obvious FB page. SO what did I learn from this…who the hell knows? There’s weirdos everywhere…be skeptical

whether you’re in that bar or not! Hahahahaha 🙂

How awesome is that story?  I’m sure he is a very nice guy but this one definitely made me giggle.  I wish I could have been there for the “Do you wanna hold my light saber” part.  You all know I love a good penis reference. As someone who has barely seen the first Star Wars movie (and wasn’t very entertained), I clearly don’t appreciate the weight of that offer.  It’s not you, it’s us, Jedi Man.

6 Comments leave one →
  1. Sasha permalink
    February 24, 2011 3:37 pm

    Hahahaha….so, basically, he larps for a living. A jedi? Really? Until you can move shit with your mind, you are NOT a Jedi…you’re just a weirdo.

  2. RobertJamHenson permalink
    February 24, 2011 4:17 pm

    So wait…she WOULDN’T date a Jedi. No pleasing some women I guess.

  3. Elizbeth Chesnes permalink
    February 24, 2011 4:40 pm

    LOVE this post, I only wish I was in Cosi to see Karen swing the saber 🙂 Life is full of challenges and the truth is a “good man” is difficult to find. All I can say is don’t give up for like a “good man” a “good woman”, like yourself, is also hard to find. Life has a way of handing us “gems” when we least expect it — Best of luck and enjoy today!!!
    PS I have have told my daughter many times — I have no time for a man without a job — . Beware of men that say they are in business for themselves! This generally, not always, translates into can not get along with anyone — Really — I don’t care where they work or what they do — as long as they get a paycheck! Pondering, exactly who is footing the bill for this Jedi’s lifestyle???

  4. Betsy permalink
    February 24, 2011 6:14 pm

    This would only happen to Karen! Hahaha, after my speed dating experince last night, I sympathize. And look, while I pretend to be really cool on the outside, I am a nerd at heart, I love Harry Potter, Star Wars and Twilight (god did I just admit that on the internet??), this is even too much for me. How poor Karen did not laugh in his face and continue to make fun of him is beyond me. Becuase lord knows I would.

  5. Erin permalink
    February 24, 2011 6:46 pm

    I love the fact that he carries light sabers in his trunk.

    …hey, baby, is that a light saber or are you just happy to see me?

    …wanna see my saber, baby?

    …so, two sabers walked into a bar…



  6. Dave permalink
    September 2, 2011 12:44 pm

    Actually Pa Jedi are not LARP-ers. They are a stage choreography based out of Philly. I saw them at a convention as well as the Please Touch Museum with all those kids. Now it isn’t my cup of tea but it did look like fun and from what I understand they do a lot for college students who want to get into writing.

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